Gen. 2:18-25
Intro: We have all heard the expression "a marriage made in
Heaven." But, does such an animal exist? Is there such a thing as a
perfect marriage? Probably not! However, there was, at one time, a marriage
that was made in paradise. In the text we have just read, we are given the
details of the very first wedding. When this took place, there was no sin in
the world and everything was perfect. The marriage rate was 100% and the
divorce rate was 0%. Then the fall came and sin entered the world. With sin
came all the problems and wretchedness of the curse. With these problems, came
trouble at home. One would spend a long time seeking the perfect marriage. Oh,
there are many who claim that they "never speak a harsh word." Either
they are screaming too loud for the words to be coherent, or they are just
plain liars! The truth is, in many cases, marriage resembles a battlefield more
than it does a union of 2 lovers.
Consider these facts. In this century, the divorce rate has risen over 700%.
In 1960, there were 393,000 divorces. Now, there are over 1.2 million per year,
and the rate is rising! Now, there is one divorce for every 1.8 marriages. Over
one million children in America will be involved in a divorce case. Of course,
there are some sociologists who say that we can expect to see a decline in the
divorce rate in the near future. Is this because people are developing better
social skills and are learning how to communicate and work through their
problems more productively? No! They just aren't getting married. They are
living together instead. Either way, it is a far cry from what the Lord
intended!
Tonight, I want us to look into these verses and think for a while about A
Marriage Made In Paradise. In this passage, God reveals His intentions
concerning marriage and His goals for the married couple. The principles taught
here will go a long way in helping to divorce proof our marriages. Let's take a
few minutes this evening to look into this text and see for ourselves what makes
a marriage made in paradise.
I. V. 18
THE LORD'S INTENTION
A.
The Lord's Concern - Ill. The Garden of Eden was a place
of unspeakable beauty and wonder. It was a perfect place where God, man and the
animal kingdom enjoyed perfect peace and harmony. It was a good place. In fact,
looking back on the Lord's creative efforts in chapter 1, it is clear that the
Lord thought it was good as well. (Ill. 1:4; 10; 12; 18; 21; 25; 31.) When God
looked at His handiwork, He declared it all good until He looked at Adam and
saw that Adam was the only one of his kind. This, God said, was not good. Man
had no counterpart. The word
"alone" carries the idea of
"
being cut of, of being a piece which is isolated from the whole."
(Ill. Lest anyone who is single should get the wrong idea, it is not always
God's will for everyone to be married - Ill. Jesus - Matt. 19:11-12; Paul - 1
Cor. 7:7. There are times and circumstances when God has determined that He can
better use someone when they are unattached and single - 1 Cor. 7:32-33.
Therefore, instead of being upset with the Lord and doing everything in your
power to attract a mate, perhaps the correct response would be to realize that
the Lord might have a better plan for your life.)
B.
The Lord's Conclusion - When the Lord surveyed the
situation, His decision was to produce a "
help" for Adam.
This word means, "
One who assists another to reach fulfillment."
It speaks of the idea of a "
completer". The word "
meet"
refers to one who
"is suitable to, or corresponds to." In
other words, God is going to give Adam someone who will fill up that which is
lacking in his own life. One who makes him complete.
(Ill. This is one of the benefits of marriage. The husband and the wife
complement one another. Men are right brain creatures. We like to analyze
things and come to conclusions about stuff. We like to figure it out. I mean
just call it like it is and never for one minute try to see any other side of
the story. If we are going to look at something from a left brained approach,
we have to stop using the right side of the brain and we are left without any
reasoning ability whatsoever. Women, on the other hand, have been gifted by God
to be able to use both sides of their brains simultaneously. They can see both
sides of the coin at the same time. A fact that makes them very helpful in
figuring out things, but very frustrating and confusing to live with. If there
were only men, there would be little compassion, little understanding and
little caring. Women make up that which we too often lack. When they come along
with their left brains firing on all cylinders and point out how narrow we are
and what we are refusing to see, then, it become clear that they have made us
complete and given us an insight that we otherwise would never have had.)
(Ill. God's intention in making woman was to compliment and complete the
man. By the way, it still works that way today.)
I.
The Lord's Intention
II. V. 19-22
THE LORD'S INTERVENTION
A. V. 19-20
A Desire Shaped By God - In these verses, God
has the entirety of the animal kingdom pass before Adam. He tells Adam to look
at them and to give them names and whatever Adam called them, that was the
name. Now, God's intention here is far deeper than a mere intellectual
exercise. He isn't trying to give Adam's brain a workout. The real goal here is
awaken a desire in Adam for companionship.
As Adam saw all these animals pass before him. Surely he must have noticed
that everyone of them had a mate. It must have dawned on Adam that he was the
only creature who seemed to be alone.
(Ill. That desire that awakens in us that causes us to begin to look on the
members of the opposite sex with interest is natural and God given. There is in
the heart of mankind a deep seated desire for companionship.)
(Ill. Some parents have a problem with this interest. Even some young people
who are feeling these desires have a problem admitting that mom and dad just
aren't going to suffice forever. I want to say that this is a natural part of
the transition from childhood to adulthood. There comes a time in every normal,
well adjusted life when a person begins to feel a yearning to "settle
down" with someone they love. It is a normal part of life.)
B.
A Desire Satisfied By God - (Ill. The Lord never awakens
a desire that He isn't prepared to fulfil in His own way and in His own time.
Our problem is that we have these desires in us and we set about satisfying
them on our own, and in our own time. When we do, we have short-circuited the
plan of God and are on thin ice. When this desire came to the surface in Adam's
life, God set about meeting that need. There were three things involved in
providing this help meet for Adam.
1.
It Involved Sleep - When it came time for God to make a
helpmeet for Adam, He caused Adam to go to sleep while He did His work. In
other words, Adam was totally uninvolved in the selection process. It, like
nearly everything else in life, fell to the sovereign choice of God.
(Ill. There is a lesson here for those of you who are looking for that
future spouse. The best thing you can do is just let that area of your life go
to sleep and trust the Lord to bring that person into your life in His time and
in His way. But, that isn't what we are told to do. We are told that one must
be pro-active, that one must make things happen. You gotta go out there and
grab hold of the one you choose and use any means in your arsenal to see that
they do not go to someone else. What a lack of faith! If God can be trusted to
save your soul from Hell, do you not think that He can also be trusted to bring
you the mate He wants you to have? May I remind you that the "just are to
live by faith," Hab. 2:4.)
2.
It Involved Surgery - While Adam was asleep, God
performed surgery on Adam, opened him up and took out a rib. It was from this
rib that God made the woman.
(Ill. Surgery always involves pain. Often, finding a mate involves pain and
even after a mate has been secured and vows have been exchanged, there are
still painful times. However, we must learn to trust the Lord during the
difficult times and to remember our commitment made to our spouse. We must
fight for our marriages. One Christian marriage counselor said, "
The
only thing that I have ever seen will make a marriage last is that the couple
wants to be married to each other more than they want to divorce.")
3.
It Involves Symbolism - Notice where the woman came
from. In taking her from the side of man, God was painting a picture that
speaks volumes about what the marriage relationship should be. Matthew Henry
put it this way, "
Eve was made by God not out of Adam's head to rule
over him, nor our of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side
to be equal with him, from under his arm to be protected and from near his
heart to be loved."
I.
The Lord's Intention
II.
The Lord's Intervention
III. V. 23-25
THE LORD'S INVENTION (When I speak of the
Lord's invention, I am not talking about woman, although that is pretty
remarkable. I am referring to the institution of marriage. These verses
constitute what was the first marriage ceremony. There are three aspects that
were involved in that first marriage ceremony that will go a long way in
helping our relationships.
A. V. 23
Marriage Involves A Response - Ill. When Adam
awakened out of sleep, the first thing he saw was this brand new, absolutely
beautiful, absolutely perfect woman there with him. Adam's response is to say,
"Now this is one like me." Quite literally, Adam said,
"Yes!" Or, as one great theologian put it, "Hot diggety!"
What Adam meant was that finally here was one that he just did not want to live
without. Here was one who was compatible with him, one with whom he could carry
out the Lord's directive, of Gen. 1:28.
(Ill. The lesson here is that in any marriage, there must be that element of
heartfelt love and the sure knowledge that this is THE person God has created
just for me. Folk, marriage is not something to be entered into lightly. It
should be prayed about and strictly observed according to the Lord's
commandments. If His Word is ignored, there can be nothing but trouble in the marriage
relationship! It involves a response and that response is to say yes to that
person that God has picked and prepared just for you.)
B. V. 24
Marriage Involves A Responsibility - Adam goes on
to say that a man is to "
leave" his parents and "
cleave"
to his wife. This is a two step process that many couple would do well to
consider.
1. To leave means to place every other relationship at a lower priority than
the marriage relationship. Excluding, of course, one's relationship with God.
Your husband or wife is to be more than just a spouse. They are to literally be
your best friend - Mal. 2:14. Leaving means that every activity outside of the
marriage relationship must take a backseat. This includes things like
businesses, hobbies, friends, careers, sports, even church work. Outside of
one's relationship with God, there is no other relationship as important as the
one you have with your spouse!
2. To cleave means to "
adhere to, to stick to, to be bound together
by some strong bond." Cleaving isn't an instant thing. Rather, it is
a lifelong pursuit. It begins at the marriage altar and continues to the
deathbed. It speaks of total and absolute commitment. This is a word that is
lacking in our modern society, especially when it comes to arena of marriage.
The modern mind set says, "
Well, we'll try it for a while and if it
doesn't work, then I'll just find me a new one." That is a far cry
from what God intended in the beginning! You see, "cleaving" is not a
passive endeavor. In other words, it doesn't just happen, it comes about as the
result of effort. I say that any marriage is worth whatever effort is required
to save it! By the way, the New Testament word for cleave means, "
to
stick like glue, to be welded together so that the two cannot be separated
without serious damage to both." If we really believe that 2 become 1
flesh when they are married, then we would also believe that anything that tore
that apart was a serious matter.
(Ill. Every married couple in this room needs to realize that they have been
made one. You are not really a couple, you are a single unit. Declared by God
in Heaven to be joined together until death rips you apart. If we really lived
with this assurance, it would transform our homes, our churches and our nation!
Then, divorce would not be an option, but just like we would spare no expense
or effort to save a member of our own body, we would everything in our power to
safeguard our marriages.)
C. V. 25
Marriage Involves A Righteousness - This verse
tells us that Adam and Eve were naked, but that they were not ashamed in their
nudity. This verse simply drives home the truth that the only valid arena for
sexual expression is within the marriage relationship. Do not be mislead by
this world and its twisted definitions of what constitutes sex. In my opinion,
one which I think is backed up by the Bible, anything that goes beyond holding
hands and a simple kiss is sexual activity and dishonoring to the Lord and
demeaning to you and your relationship with another person.
It may be old
fashioned, but I believe the Lord will bless it! (Ill. Heb. 13:4)
Conc: If you were honest this evening and you were to take your marriage and
lay it alongside this passage, would your marriage stand as one that was made
in paradise? Or, would you have to say that there is some "leaving and
cleaving" that needs to take place in our relationship? Is there some
activity or pursuit that is coming between you and your spouse? Do you feel
that you are one flesh this evening? What I am asking is that husbands and wives
take a long hard look at their relationships and then respond together, before
the Lord and allow Him to have His way in your marriage. Are there needs in
your relationship this evening? Maybe you are married to an unbeliever, why not
bring them to Jesus and talk to Him about that need? Maybe the sizzle has begun
to fizzle, why not come before the Lord and ask Him to rekindle the flames that
once burned so passionately. Bring your marriage to Jesus and let Him fix it if
it is broken, let Him strengthen it if it is weak and let Him make it even
better if it is already good this evening.
Maybe you're not even married, but you are concerned about the future and
the person you will marry, why not bring that need to the Lord. Singles and
singles again, are there areas of your life that need to be brought under the
Lord's control this evening? Please understand that God has a plan for everyone
here. Part of that plan includes salvation, that is a constant for everyone.
Beyond that, God has an individual plan for your life. I am asking you tonight
to come before Him and find out what it is. Will you do that?
If we learn nothing else, let's learn how to keep the home fires burning!
By Pastor Alan Carr
Pastor Rolando Ramos
www.fghconline.com
